


My Husband is Very Weird

by littlemissbunny



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Best Friends, Cats, Dorks in Love, Everyone Is Alive, Everyone Is Gay, Family Dynamics, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gay as in happy, Humor, M/M, Married Life, Same-Sex Marriage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-06-03 13:15:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6611992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlemissbunny/pseuds/littlemissbunny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A look into the married life of Shuu and Ken Tsukiyama-Kaneki.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just Married

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so I was thinking about writing a story about these two dorks and I couldn't help but to make them into a dorky married couple. So here you go, parts of my trash from the dumpster.

Ken wasn't exactly sure how he had gotten himself married to Tsukiyama Shuu. While he's not trying to sound ungrateful or even disgusted by the thought of it, he just couldn't help but to feel weird from the whole experience. He was just amazed and slightly baffled by the whole thing and for logical reasons.  
While Shuu had come from a large, rich, and infamous family; Ken had came from a rather small family and didn't really know his parents well since they had died while he was still young. Shuu had also gone to some of the best schools in Japan and even went abroad to France and America, while the white haired male stayed in his country and attended regular schools. It also wasn't just their background that was different either, but their beings as well.  
Shuu was a loud, zealous, confident, optimistic, and open minded person, while Ken himself was more quiet, pessimistic, narrow minded, and more reserved than his azuline haired spouse. Their physical appearances was also a wonder. Shuu was practically a walking god with his soft pale skin, tall lean muscular body, sea colored hair, and his striking blood red eyes. Somehow someone as gorgeous and high class as him was attracted to him, Kaneki Ken; a plain small bodied skinny man with white hair dye with heterochromia who didn't catch anyone's eyes.

No body but _his_ that is.

He just couldn't help but to wonder how someone like him of all would want to date, let alone _marry_ someone like him. It just didn't make sense to him. He was thinking about it, even though it was been literally days since he's married the older gentleman. And while on their honeymoon. Why on earth would he, Tsukiyama Shuu, want to spend the rest of his life with him? Ken had even asked Shuu this question, in fact multiple times and he would always receive the same reply, "Because Ken, je t'aime mon petit lys." That reply drove Ken up the wall because he knew that he doesn't know any foreign languages, especially French. He needed to ask him what that meant and to make sure he really answered him unlike other times.

 

Ken was currently sitting on their king sized bed with an open book in hand as he thought of these thoughts. He was reading earlier before those thoughts came to his head and distracted him from reading. He almost wondered how long he had been reading before he heard the door to the bathroom opening, revealing a very well relaxed Shuu with a towel around his hips and another over his shoulders from his bath. Somehow he had forgotten he was in there.

"Ah Ken, I'm sorry I kept you waiting. I didn't mean to take so long." The man apologized with an apologetic smile on his face. "You didn't take long." was Ken's only reply as he was slowly coming back to reality from his thoughts. "You know," the blue haired man began with a husky low voice as he stared at the younger male, "you could've joined in the bath. It would've saved more money and given us more time to get used to each other."

There was another thing that had to be known about Shuu that Ken would've usually find as annoying in any person.

 

He was a complete pervert.


	2. Ch.2 In which the hubby calls his 'mother'

It had been just about five months after Ken and Shuu had officially became Tsukiyama-Kaneki and life as you could put it was very...interesting to say the very least. Sure it was very cute or romantic to some people, but at the end of the day it was still all very interesting to Ken. For starters, the two were now living in a large penthouse near Shuu's company building he was working at and about 30 minutes away from Ken's job. Another thing was the routine of seeing each other single day. Now of course this wasn't really a problem, it was just something Ken had tried to get used to after a while (especially since it's been like 5 years since he's lived with anyone).  
Ken had also learned to live with the fact that he's apparently rich now that he's married to Shuu. This was something that he still can't really grasp even in his own dreams. His aunt and even his friends would have to occasionally remind him that he doesn't have to buy cheap things back in the first month or so after coming back from the honeymoon. He'll admit that the habit had developed after four years in a cheap and dingy apartment while in college.

But if he was to be completely honest with himself, the one and true challenge that he's still trying to overcome, is the fact that he shares a bed with Shuu.

Sharing a bed Shuu.

Now this wouldn't be really difficult if only he wasn't such a total pansy about it. Especially since he's pretty much married to the guy now. Plus the fact that he hasn't had sex with the poor guy yet. This thought always made the white haired man groan in annoyance. He just really wished that wasn't such a pansy about things in life. He was pretty sure that this was the only real problem that he needed to fix, to just sleep with the man and not be scared of losing his virginity to him already. Maybe he could just get drunk with Shuu and hopefully they do it together while in their drunken state. That is until Ken had remembered a very sad fact about his drunk self from Shuu.

"You tend to act like a happy five year old when you're drunk, and it's so cute!"

Ken could only groan at this 'depressing' fact and groaned as he had realized that there was really nothing for him to do but one option. Calling someone for help or at least some kind of advice. The only question was from who though. He could call Touka, but then she would scream from him to look it up or just do it already(or rather anything to keep her from getting involved). He could also call Hide for some guidance, but then he would tell him to not really worry about it and that everything will be fine.

Ken was really running out of options as to who he should really call, he's practically looking through his contacts list on his phone for anybody. Hope almost seemed distant from him before he scrolled back up to the A section of the names before seeing his aunt's contact come into view. Ken hesitated for a moment. Should he call and ask her about this? He did trust her after all and she was pretty much like a mom to him. If anything a tough and hardcore mom if anything. He loves her, he truly does, it's just that she was kinda tough while raising him and his older cousin, especially for grades and anything school related. But at the end of the day, she was still a kind and caring mother figure who really loved her boys and looked for their well being. Besides, he had let her walk him down the aisle when he had married Shuu(even while she was glaring daggers at the poor man).

Ken hesitated a moment before touching the contact sign under her named. He was home alone while Shuu was running some errands before he could get back from work. The phone rang for a few minutes before he heard a clicking sound from the other end.

"Moshi Moshi, Kitoaji residence."  
"Um, aunt Ami, it's me, Ken."  
Ken could hear the change in her voice after saying his name. "Hi Kenny, how are you? Everything going ok there with your hubby?" she asked. It was nice to know that she had grown to like him at least a little bit to ask how Shuu was doing. She wasn't his biggest fan when he had first met Shuu before dating.   
"Everything's great so far. Shuu's been busy lately but he's been good." he answered the older woman, "He'll possibly have to go travel to Germany soon though for a business agreement."  
The line was quiet for a moment, only before Ken had noticed the noticeable sound of something hitting what sounded like wood and slicing, which meant she was obviously cooking. "You're upset he's going to be leaving then?" the older woman asked with concentration in her voice in both the cooking and in Ken's well being. She may not have birthed him but she loved him like her sister had loved him. She wasn't like other people who saw orphans as a nuisance, especially if that said orphan was her own nephew.

"Uh, no-not exactly, I just need some advice from you about something. It's kinda important." The white haired male explained nervously. "What is it?" she asked curiously. It was rare for Ken to ask her something important. Especially since he's been married.

"How and when do you think is it ok to have sex with your spouse?"

There was a loud noise from his aunts side of the line, and he could guess that she had dropped a pot. He could also hear the sound of footsteps shuffling before the sound of a door closing was heard, then he heard his aunt's voice again. "Ken what's going on over there?" she asked the young male. She sounded pretty pissed and that could only mean that she was on mama mode. "It's nothing really, I was just wonder because, because-" he could feel his face heating up from the awkwardness of the conversation. This was just embarrassing. "Me and Shuu have been married for five months now and we haven't done anything. Plus I'm too scared to sleep with him yet because Touka and Hide told me how painfully it was going to be but then-" "Kenny calm down I understand the situation now!" Ken had immediately shut up. He didn't mean to be that open to her. 

"Ken, you don't have to force yourself if you're not ready to do that yet." she began in a 'matter a fact' tone. "If Shuu really loves you then he wouldn't push into doing that, especially since you're a virgin."   
Ken put this into slight consideration after hearing those words. She did have a point, even though Shuu was indeed a huge pervert, he had never pushed Ken into those types of things. "H-How long did you wait until...you did it?" "Five months." This had caught him a bit off guard, he didn't expect her to answer so easily. "Ok then, thank you for answer my questions." he thanked his 'mother'. "That's fine, but if you need any help at all just call me and your uncle, don't leave us hanging. Ok?" Yep, Ken was sure to ask any more questions if necessary. "Ok."

 

....

"Ken why are you still here?"

"I just need to ask, does it really hurt the first time?"  
...........  
Messing with him wouldn't hurt.

"It was more painful than the time you broke your leg."  
And then she hung up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the ending was rushed, but I couldn't think of anything else, I honestly didn't want to leave you guys hanging.  
> Also thank you guys for the kudos and hits, I'll try to write the next chapter really soon!


	3. Ch.3 Shuu was bored and lonely

Shuu was bored, and that was a fact.

The aqua haired many was currently laying on the white fabric couch in his living room, home alone. His dear sweet husband was stuck at work for a meeting that was called at the last minute, which forces him to come home at around 5:30 to 6:30. Shuu turned his head to the coffee table across from him with a small light baby blue digital clock reading 4:30 p.m. which left about one or two more hours before Ken gets out of the meeting and gets home, which was a twenty minute walk.   
Shuu let out an irritated groan from the thoughts. He really wanted to see his innocent Kenny. The grown man rolled a little on the couch as he thought of his small husband. 

"Keeeeeeeeeeeeny-kuuuuuuuuuuun!" he wailed before he finally rolled of the couch and onto the white beige carpet face first. The poor man groaned at his misfortune. He really wanted to see Ken soon and not see him stressed from working so hard. Why did he choose to be a high school teacher?  
"Ken-Kun, please come home." Shuu said against the carpet, his voice being muffled by the ground.  
He was extremely bored and missed his husband. He had finished all his work, which left him to be free from that day to at least Monday. Also, there really wasn't anyone he could talk to. He could call Matsumae or Kanae, but then either one would drive all the way here from home just to talk to him and more than likely start cleaning and cooking there like they were the new servants there, which was what he DIDN'T want. Before him and Ken had started living together, he had made it very clear that he didn't want or need any servants of any kind with them. He felt that he needed independence from the that sort of life style, but there was also the fact that Ken was not comfortable with people doing things that he can clearly do himself.   
Shuu couldn't help but to sink increasingly into boredom before hearing a faint sound of purrs from nearby. Turning his head so his face wasn't against the carpet, his red eyes were met with the familiar green eyes of his Tabby, Kouichi. The young feline was watching Shuu with curiosity written on his (adorable) facial features, confused as to why his owner was on the floor. Shuu let out another sigh as he raised his body so he could sit on the soft floor in a comfortable position. He looked at his small companion before picking up the feline to raise him at eye level.

"Oh Ichi-kun, what am I suppose to do while Neki is gone?" he asked the brown furred cat, almost as if he could answer him in his language. With only a small purr from the cat as his response, Shuu continued to talk to the poor mammal. "Ken won't be here until later, and he'll be tired and have to work some more on grading his students work." He dramatically laid on his back against the carpet, with Kouichi raised into the air above his owner. "He'll be too tired to even say hello to me! Or even to you!" he 'cried' with drama. Poor Kouichi was just slightly annoyed with the man's tactics and just wanted to leave, but he knew he couldn't. Plus he was too tired to even fight against him. 

"I wish Ken was here now." Shuu said defectively to himself. "That way he doesn't have to be so stressed on work and just come home and relax." The man picked himself up with the cat still in his pale hands. Kouichi could only give a few glares at the man. He of course was oblivious to those glares from the feline, he was lost in the thoughts of what he would do if his sweet husband was home with him.  
'I could shower him in hugs and kisses and tell him how much I love him, even though it makes his face so red! I could even cook his favorite hamburgers, maybe I could even make enough for him to take to lunch tomorrow. Or-" And the azuline haired continued on with what he would do to Ken once he's home, with Kouichi still in his arms.

He was not amused at all.

As this was going on, Shuu had failed to notice the door to their apartment being unlocked and opening to reveal his white haired husband, tired and slightly happy. The principle had decided to end the meeting short because apparently he had plane flight to left in about two hours and he needed to be there. This Ken was thankful for because he really didn't want to stay there later than planned, especially since Shuu would be home alone.   
Walking into their share apartment, Ken nearly said hello before he heard his husband rambling in the living room. Looking up to see what he was talking about, he stopped dead in his tracks to see the older man spinning around in their living room, holding Kouichi in his arms like he was doing the waltz, and singing some kind of song in French. Ken watched as his lover spun around their living room, oblivious to his and seeing his poor baby in his arms who seemed to have realized his presence and giving him a gaze that screamed 'HELP ME NOW'.

Walking over to the kitchen counter, Ken placed his work back and small paper bag with Shuu's favorite donut inside, and sat on one of the high chairs as he watched Shuu harass the poor feline. He was being as quiet as he possibly could.

"Oh Ichi-kun if Ken were here right now, he would feel so loved and admired that he would be speechless! His face would be so red he'd look like a-" but before Shuu could finish his sentence, both his and Ken's ears were met with the most inhuman noise that had come from the vocal chords of the very irritated Kouichi.

YAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Shuu had instinctively let go of the brown feline, in which Kouichi safely landed on the ground and made a dash for the married couple's room to hide under the large bed. Back in the living room, Shuu stood in complete shock and confusion written all over his beautiful face. To make it perfect, he says to himself in a weak attempt to call back the feline, "Kitty..."  
Ken couldn't hold it in any longer and bursts into a fit of laughter once he sees Shuu's reaction, and it increases once the man turns around and sees him. "You were here the entire time?" he asks his spouse who was currently dying on the counter. He could not believe he was caught doing that, especially to Kouichi.   
"N-No, not entirely." Ken responded, still giggling over the scene he had witnessed just minutes ago. "I just got here ten minutes ago. But then I saw you and Kouichi and I couldn't-" he fell into another fit of laughter, burying his head into his arms on their counter. This had to be the funniest thing he's witnessed in his marriage so far.

Shuu's cheeks were painted red from his embarrassment but also in adoration at Ken's laughter. It sounds really cute to him. That is until Ken accidentally lets out a loud snort. Then Shuu is the one laughing at his poor blushing husband. This was a very entertaining evening, and Shuu's boredom was worth it.

 

Twenty minutes later after Ken is settled in after the whole ordeal, him and his husband are in their shared bedroom on the floor at their beds trying to coax Kouichi out from under the bed for dinner. This goes on for a half hour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry, I don't know how to do cat noises on fanfics. Or snort noises. Or any noises (other than moans that is).  
> *sips a mug full of grape juice* Welp enjoy your day/evening while I look for/think of more hilarious and cute scenarios for these dorks.
> 
> Also a quick shout out to Kanae_van_Krieken, thank you for liking my stories so far, I will try my best to try and improve on both them and future writings!


End file.
